There's nothing better than sitting down to lunch, turning on the TV, and discovering that the pizza you're eating has been recalled for possible E. Coli contamination, is there?

posted by Crash at 11:41 AM

 

So it's official, according to the neurologist. Mrs. Davis has MS.

It's unsettling, to be sure, but we're thankful it's not something more sinister. As she has put it "If I'm going to have a disease it's better to have one that's been around long enough to have treatments available. I don't want my brain to be a guinea pig."

posted by Crash at 5:27 PM

 



posted by Crash at 4:24 PM

 

Barry Manilow may not be aware of it, but in 1976 he recorded the perfect song to accompany a Viagra commercial:


Doctor, my woman is comin' back home late today
Could you maybe give me somethin'?
'Cause the feeling is gone and I must get it back right away
Before she sees that

I've been up, down, tryin' to get the feeling again
All around, tryin' to get the feeling again
The one that made me shiver
Made my knees start to quiver
Every time she walked in

And I've looked high (high), low (low)
Everywhere I possibly can (high)
But there's no (no) tryin' to get the feelin' again
It seemed to disappear as fast as it came

Where did it run to? I thought I'd done all that I could
Just to keep the love light burnin'
But whatever I've done, guess I just haven't done it too good
'cause all that's left is

I've been up, down, tryin' to get the feelin' again
All around, tryin' to get the feelin' again
The one that made me shiver, made my knees start to quiver
Every time she walked in

And I've looked high (high) and low (low)
And everywhere I possibly can (high)
But there's no (no) tryin' to get the feelin' again
It seemed to disappear as fast as it came

And I've been lookin', I've been lookin', I've been lookin'

I've been up (up), I've been down (down), tryin' to get the feelin'
I've been up (up), I've been down (down), I've been tryin' to get
I've tried and I've tried and I've tried to get (up) the feelin' (down)
I've been trying to get the feelin' again
I wanna get that feelin'
I want to get that feelin'
I've got to get that feelin'
I've gotta get that feelin' again (up)
And again (down) and again (tryin' to get that feelin')
Tryin' to get (up) the feelin' (down)
I've been tryin' to get the feelin' again!!!

--Words and Music by David Pomeranz

posted by Crash at 3:33 PM

 

Piercings for your car.

posted by Crash at 7:08 PM

 

"Our prices are lower than the evildoers' every day. Just ask the pope! Friday is fatwa Friday, with free rubber swords for the kiddies."

posted by Crash at 12:27 PM

 

Pakistan throws in the towel. The hunt for Bin Laden is off. Talibanistan, here we come.

posted by Crash at 2:15 PM

 

"060606 is the telephone number to call for information on the services provided by the City of Rome".

posted by Crash at 7:01 PM

 

Drag Racing rickshaws. Loser cuts off a thumb.

posted by Crash at 4:07 PM

 

"Brown boobies in Virginia Beach? I would say, 'Wow, that's really rare.'"

posted by Crash at 12:55 PM